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	<title>TeenLife Blog</title>
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	<link>http://blog.teenlife.com</link>
	<description>Bringing Out the Best in Teens</description>
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		<title>How to Teach Your Teen Healthy Financial Thinking</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/how-to-teach-your-teen-healthy-financial-thinking/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=how-to-teach-your-teen-healthy-financial-thinking</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/how-to-teach-your-teen-healthy-financial-thinking/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 17 May 2012 15:00:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jill Suskind</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[financial literacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting teens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teen character building]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1697</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Have you ever thought your teen is “good with money” or just “a spender” and there’s nothing you can do about it?  It’s just their personality, right?   We don’t realize how much we teach our teens about money even when we aren’t trying.  Then, we see how they behave with money without understanding how [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1699" title="Teen Finances" src="http://blog.teenlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/iStock_000009685774XSmall-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="199" /></p>
<p dir="ltr"><strong><strong>Have you ever thought your teen is “good with money” or just “a spender” and there’s nothing you can do about it?  It’s just their personality, right?  </strong></strong></p>
<p dir="ltr"><strong><strong>We don’t realize how much we teach our teens about money even when we aren’t trying.  Then, we see how they behave with money without understanding how much we influenced those habits. Let’s consider what lies beneath the surface of our teen’s habits with money.<span id="more-1697"></span></strong></strong></p>
<p><strong><strong>I’ll start with a confessional.  When I was young, I had very specific beliefs about money.  I really, truly believed that</strong></strong><strong><strong><br />
</strong></strong><strong><strong><br />
</strong></strong></p>
<ul>
<li>Wealthy people were shallow. (My parents were academics, and they didn’t work to build their wealth.  They focused “living within your means” only, so you can see how I arrived at that conclusion.)</li>
<li>Money was a pain.  I never had enough, and whenever I wanted any, I had to argue with my parents.  I usually lost that argument.</li>
<li>It would be fine if I never learned to manage money; I fully expected to marry a man who would take care of that area of our lives. (My dad was in charge of the money in my home, so you can see how I arrived at that conclusion, too!)</li>
<li>Money was something “other people had, not me”.  (My parents often said &#8220;We can’t afford that&#8221;, so you can see how that thought got hatched in my young brain!)</li>
<li>There were only two things I could do with money:  save it or spend it.  I got an allowance, which I immediately spent on who-knows-what, while my sister always saved her allowance.  (My parents gave us an allowance, but never taught us money management strategies, so I never knew how to save, spend, give, and donate in a managed way.)  So, I was the daughter who was “bad with money” and my sister was “good with money”.  I believed that about myself for most of my life.</li>
<li>Rich people gave money to causes that mattered, and people like me just “walked for causes” and “sold stuff” to raise money.  I never thought of myself as a person who could use my money to make a difference in the world in ways that mattered to me.</li>
<li>Money management wasn’t for me, because I hardly had any.  And no one told me anything different.</li>
</ul>
<p><strong><strong>My parents tried to instill in me a sense of financial responsibility, but their efforts never worked well.  They didn’t realize how much they taught me, just by allowing those thoughts and beliefs to take hold.</strong></strong></p>
<p><strong><strong></strong></strong><strong><strong>Long story short, I brought these beliefs about myself, people, and money into my adult financial life.  Predictably, I became a teacher with a disastrous financial life. . . until I learned to think differently.</strong></strong></p>
<p><strong><strong>Here are some “beliefs” you can nurture in your teen that will form a solid foundation for a healthy financial life, regardless of how much money they have now and regardless of their “money personality”.</strong></strong></p>
<ol>
<li>Managing money well MAKES it grow. Not having much money is the BEST reason for managing it well.</li>
<li>Wealth is the result of a series of small steps, taken repeatedly over time. Anyone can take these steps and have this result.</li>
<li>Money is a tool that allows you to fulfill your commitments to yourself and others.</li>
<li>Managing your money takes energy and time. Being broke is truly and deeply exhausting. Wealthy people make money management important.  Broke people say, “Money isn’t important. It can wait. It’s too much of a pain.”</li>
<li>Money doesn’t MAKE you shallow or greedy. People show their true nature by the way they use their money.</li>
<li>Money management is NOT rocket science!  Learn simple money management strategies. Practice them when you’re young so they become habits that serve you as an adult.</li>
</ol>
<p><strong id="internal-source-marker_0.24966419767588377">Here are some free and useful resources to check out:<br />
<a href="https://www.mint.com/">https://www.mint.com/</a><br />
<a href="http://www.moneytrail.net/">http://www.moneytrail.net/</a></strong></p>
<p><em><a title="Jill's Website" href="www.yourteensmoneyskills.com">Jill Suskind, M.Ed.</a> is a 25-year veteran public school teacher.  Since 2007, she has been working with parents and their teens, providing innovative, practical, and effective resources and guidance for preparing teens for adulthood with positive money habits and attitudes.</em></p>
<p>Like this blog post? <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=blog_Enewsletter">Sign up for the TeenLife Newsletter</a>!</p>
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		<title>Paying for College: Initial Steps for Parents of Juniors</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/paying-for-college-initial-steps-for-parents-of-juniors/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=paying-for-college-initial-steps-for-parents-of-juniors</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/paying-for-college-initial-steps-for-parents-of-juniors/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 16 May 2012 15:00:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Carol Stack and Ruth Vedvik</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Financial Aid]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[financial aid]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[financial literacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[High School]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[high school junior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting teens]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1782</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[For many parents, covering the cost of college for their children is a “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it” topic of conversation and planning. Well, for those of you who are the parents of high school juniors – that bridge is right in front of you.  Even if you haven’t spent the last [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>For many parents, covering the cost of <a title="TeenLife's Guide to College Admissions" href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=CollegeAdmissionYM">college</a> for their children is a “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it” topic of conversation and planning.</strong></p>
<p>Well, for those of you who are the parents of high school juniors – that bridge is right in front of you.  Even if you haven’t spent the last 15 years in a disciplined savings plan that ensures you have the cash on hand to cover Susie or Sam’s college costs, there are still strategies you can employ to help cover the cost of college.  And to begin with, you need to know that the underlying assumption on which all colleges base their financial aid and scholarship programs is very simple and very clear:  the primary responsibility for paying for college rests with the student’s family and the student.  Yes, it is your responsibility and we offer three suggestions for ways to tackle that commitment.</p>
<p><strong>First:</strong>  sit down with your spouse or former spouse and start talking.   Make an inventory of the cash resources you will have available when the first bill for college – for fall semester, 2013 arrives.  Yes, in just 14 months from now, July 2013, bills for the class to enter college in fall 2013 will land in parental mailboxes.  Included, on the credit side of the equation, will be any <a title="TeenLife's College Funding" href="http://www.teenlife.com/?College_Funding">financial assistance</a> your son or daughter received based on academics, talent and need. The amount you pay could feel staggering, even if quite of bit of “other people’s money” (read: the college, federal and state governments, and external scholarships) has been subtracted from the college’s sticker price.<span id="more-1782"></span></p>
<p><strong>Second:</strong>  focus on what resources you have.  Cash from savings or assets – yours and your student’s &#8211; is easily identified.  And don’t forget that you’ll need to plan for paying for all four years.  In the need-based federal methodology used to determine how much you can afford to pay for college, more of your savings and assets will be “protected” than your student’s.  Don’t try to protect your money by moving it to your student’s accounts.   Next, think about what kind of monthly payment you can make from your income.  Almost all colleges and universities offer plans to allow you spread your share of college costs over 10 or 12 months.  Be smart about this and get a head start – begin putting that amount of cash in a savings account or 529 plan right now. You’ve still got a year to save. Of course, if you’ve got more children in the college pipeline, you’ll need to plan for them, too.</p>
<p><strong>Third:</strong>  here’s our great idea.   Take a long, hard look at your monthly bills.  If you’re making payments on a new washer and dryer, or that flat screen TV &#8212; pay it off and don’t make another purchase.   Instead, cease and desist – resist making another purchase even if you could really use that new carpet before the graduation party.  By doing so you’ll free up money for a monthly payment for college.  Voila; you found $250 a month that you can use for college.  Pay off a car and credit cards. Bite the bullet and you’ll be in a much stronger position to pay your share.</p>
<p><strong>Tell us about your saving strategies for college!</strong></p>
<p><em>Carol Stack and Ruth Vedvik, seasoned college admission and financial aid professionals, are the authors of <a href="http://thefinancialaidhandbook.com/">The </a><a href="http://thefinancialaidhandbook.com/">Financial Aid Handbook:  Getting the Education You Want for the Price You Can Afford</a></em>.</p>
<p>Like this blog post? <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=blog_Enewsletter">Sign up for the TeenLife Newsletter</a>!</p>
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		<title>We All Need a Little Help Sometimes</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/we-all-need-a-little-help-sometimes/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=we-all-need-a-little-help-sometimes</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/we-all-need-a-little-help-sometimes/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 11 May 2012 16:00:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alexandra Zabriskie</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[High School]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[advice for teenagers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parents of teens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Students]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TeenLife]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tutors]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1313</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Whenever a parent and/or teacher brings up the prospect of tutoring to a teen, one of the first questions is “Why?” Why do I need extra help? Is something wrong with me? Do you think I can’t do it on my own? Why do I have to get more schooling and do more homework? The [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Whenever a parent and/or teacher brings up the prospect of tutoring to a teen, one of the first questions is “Why?” Why do I need extra help? Is something wrong with me? Do you think I can’t do it on my own? Why do I have to get more schooling and do more homework?</p>
<p>The conversation can go many ways, and some students welcome the extra help, but for those parents looking for ways to reach their children – or to find answers themselves (Why is my child not performing to his/her best ability in school/on tests? Why do I have to spend the extra money?) I would offer the following advice.</p>
<p>Teenagers have long idolized performing artists and athletes for their charisma, fame and talent. These icons did not arrive at the pinnacles of their careers in a vacuum &#8211; they had help – a lot of it. Even as they ride the waves of stardom, they continue to turn to outside help to keep them at their best.<span id="more-1313"></span></p>
<p>In an article from the<em> </em><a title="Coaching a Surgeon: What Makes Top Performers Better?" href="http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2011/10/03/111003fa_fact_gawande" target="_blank"><em>New Yorker</em></a>, Dr. Atul Gawande writes “no matter how well prepared people are&#8230;few can achieve and maintain their best performance on their own.&#8221; In Dr. Gawande’s case, he went in search of help to improve his technique as a surgeon, even after years on the job. What he discovered was something athletes and artists have known for a long time: the need for a coach. I thought of this article while watching the Superbowl. For all the players on the team, there was another roster of coaches, assistants and aides on the sidelines &#8211; helping, advising, and doing whatever was necessary for those elite athletes to win the game. One month later I watched the Academy Awards. I <em>guarantee </em>almost all of those nominated had acting coaches during the filming of their award-worthy work, even Meryl Streep.</p>
<p>Dr. Gawande writes that most professions should have such consistent help: &#8220;Modern society increasingly depends on ordinary people taking responsibility for doing extraordinary things: operating inside people&#8217;s bodies, teaching eighth graders algebraic concepts that Euclid would have struggled with&#8230;In the absence of guidance, how many people can do such complex tasks at the level we require?&#8221;</p>
<p>I could easily re-write those words to apply to the average teenager:  &#8221;Society increasingly demands that students learn more and faster to keep up in the modern world. Science and technology, algebraic concepts that Euclid would have struggled with, well-written essays, <strong>and</strong> they have to take standardized tests to prove it. In the absence of guidance, how many students can juggle so many complex tasks at the level we require?&#8221; The answer is: not many, and none can do so without a great deal of mental anguish.</p>
<p>This brings me to a second article, in <em><a title="Mental conditioning coach Moawad gives Alabama unique prep edge" href="http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/vault/article/web/COM1191865/index.htm" target="_blank">Sports Illustrated</a>, </em>which profiles an independent coach named Trevor Moawad, who works with the University of Alabama&#8217;s football team, known as the Crimson Tide. He is <em>not</em>, however, an athletic coach; Moawad is in charge of the team&#8217;s <em>mental</em> fitness. Moawad says that for every &#8220;I can&#8217;t&#8221; statement, a player &#8220;will need 10 positive experiences to counteract that one negative thought&#8230;&#8221; His job is to make sure the players never get to the point of “I can’t.” Mr. Moawad, whose other clients include units of the U.S. military and the New York Yankees, asserts that the general operating principle of &#8216;seeing is believing&#8217; is wrong. “…[our] overall philosophy is the opposite. Believing is seeing. Once you believe it, you&#8217;re going to see it.&#8221; In other words, while practice and preparation are absolutely necessary, performance is also inextricably tied to the mind.</p>
<p>Once again, athletes and artists are ahead of the game. Most trained actors will tell you “staying out of my head” is the number one challenge they face when on-stage. They cannot be thinking about their performance and acting at the same time. The number one compliment offered to Eli Manning after winning the Super Bowl? How calm and <em>level-headed</em> he was in the crucial 4<sup>th</sup> quarter.</p>
<p>The same goes for any student in a test-taking situation. Even an A+ student can’t work to the best of their ability if they are also thinking &#8220;I could/should have, this wasn’t supposed to be on the test, I didn’t study enough, I’m bad at this subject, I can’t&#8230;&#8221; Many tutors, myself included, now dedicate several hours to helping a student relieve their “performance anxiety,” thereby improving their test-taking experience regardless of the subject matter. Reading the article in <em>Sports Illustrated</em>, I wasn’t surprised to learn that some of the exercises Moawad used for the Tide sounded a lot like ones used in acting classes, which I long ago adapted in my tutoring practice.</p>
<p>So when a teenager or a parent asks “Why?” the simple answer is: we <em>all</em> need a little help sometimes; it has nothing to do with intelligence or level of experience. We aren&#8217;t born walking or talking. None of us reach our personal best in a vacuum. That&#8217;s what <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">coaches</span> tutors are for: to teach, to guide, to show the way.</p>
<p><em><a title="Alexandra Zabriskie" href="http://www.atoztutor.com/" target="_blank">Alexandra Zabriskie</a> has worked as a private tutor on standardized tests and academics for over a decade. An Ivy League graduate and New York City native, she knows what it takes to succeed, covering everything a student needs from A to Z.</em></p>
<p>Like this blog post? <a title="Teen Life Newsletter" href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=blog_Enewsletter" target="_blank">Sign up for the TeenLife Newsletter</a>!</p>
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		<title>Here Comes the Prom! Are your teens ready to step out for the big night?</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/here-comes-the-prom-are-your-teens-ready-to-step-out-for-the-big-night/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=here-comes-the-prom-are-your-teens-ready-to-step-out-for-the-big-night</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/here-comes-the-prom-are-your-teens-ready-to-step-out-for-the-big-night/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 10 May 2012 16:18:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Hilary Brennan</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[High School]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[etiquette]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[high school students]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting teens]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1721</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[No other school event rivals the anticipation and excitement for both students and parents. The prom is the chance to dress our best, celebrate friendships and create memories that will define the high school experience. But be careful: Students caught up in the social frenzy of prom planning may not realize that the evening will [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span style="color: #000000;"><strong><a href="http://blog.teenlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Are-you-ready-for-the-Promphoto-1.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1778" title="Are you ready for the Prom?" src="http://blog.teenlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Are-you-ready-for-the-Promphoto-1-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="199" /></a>No other school event rivals the anticipation and excitement for both students and parents.</strong> The prom is the chance to dress our best, celebrate friendships and create memories that will define the high school experience. But be careful: Students caught up in the social frenzy of prom planning may not realize that the evening will test their “social IQ” on multiple levels: invitations, introductions, host and guest duties, conversations, attire and dining manners.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #000000;">Those with limited experience attending formal occasions may discover that the prom will be the first time they find themselves thrust into unfamiliar situations. The prom provides a great opportunity for <a title="TeenLife" href="https://www.teenlife.com/">teens</a> to learn proper etiquette and be able to practice these valuable social skills that will last a lifetime.<span id="more-1721"></span></span></p>
<p><span style="color: #000000;">Here’s a crash course in basic social skills because the reality is “you don’t know what you don’t know.” Being prepared will help students to be confident and aware, so that ultimately everyone will enjoy this new experience.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #000000;"><strong>Tips to empower your students:</strong></span></p>
<ol>
<li><span style="color: #000000;"><strong>Inviting a date:</strong>  Whether it’s a gentlemen or lady doing the asking – do it in person! Resist the urge to hide behind a text, e-mail or phone when you are ready to invite.  Approach with a beaming smile, make great eye contact, and use a confident voice to extend an invitation.</span></li>
<li><span style="color: #000000;"><strong>Meeting parents:</strong> Know how to introduce yourself: “Hello my name is John Smith, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” while maintaining good posture, great eye contact, hands out of pockets and shoulders back.</span></li>
<li><span style="color: #000000;"><strong>What to wear:</strong> Your attire defines who you are to others – it’s that simple. Send the right message by selecting items that fit properly and comply with school dress guidelines to avoid awkward wardrobe malfunctions.</span></li>
<li><span style="color: #000000;"><strong>Be a thoughtful host and guest:</strong>  That means, be a great date! Every couple shares a responsibility to be socially prepared for the evening:  greet people with a smile, be congenial and by all means, be ready to dance.  A cell phone should not figure into any aspect of the evening. Keep it out of sight until there’s a restroom break. Stay engaged! Conversation topics could include: summer plans, favorite vacations/ books/ movies/cartoon characters, thoughts on college, or future plans.</span></li>
<li><span style="color: #000000;"><strong>Gracious gestures:</strong> Gentlemen, make young ladies feel special by opening doors, pulling out chairs and standing when women enter or exit a table. Never slip out of a pre- or post-party without thanking the host.</span></li>
</ol>
<div><span style="color: #000000;"><strong>What etiquette advice would you give your teen for prom?</strong></span></div>
<p><span style="color: #000000;"><em><a href="http://www.sociallysavvynj.com">Hilary Brennan </a>has taught hundreds of individuals to be more confident and prepared in business and social situations. The founder of Socially Savvy, a New Jersey-based etiquette and social skills training company, she is dedicated to empowering individuals to develop their interpersonal skills, improve their personal brand and refine their professionalism.</em></span></p>
<p>Like this blog post? <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=blog_Enewsletter">Sign up for the TeenLife Newsletter</a>!</p>
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		<title>It&#8217;s Not Too Late To Consider A Gap Year</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/its-not-too-late-to-consider-a-gap-year/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=its-not-too-late-to-consider-a-gap-year</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/its-not-too-late-to-consider-a-gap-year/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 07 May 2012 16:00:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Marie Schwartz</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[College Admissions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Financial Aid]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[a gap year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gap year fairs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gap year programs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gap year work]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Marie Schwarts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Taking a gap year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TeenLife]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Teens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[the gap year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[what is a gap year]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1680</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Now that you&#8217;ve seen most of your teen&#8217;s college acceptance (or rejection) letters you may see a clear path forward–4 wonderful years at a school that&#8217;s a great fit academically, socially, and financially. But, as thousands of families are discovering, you or your student may not be completely sure that college should be the next step [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Now that you&#8217;ve seen most of your teen&#8217;s college acceptance (or rejection) letters you may see a clear path forward–4 wonderful years at a school that&#8217;s a great fit academically, socially, and financially. But, as thousands of families are discovering, you or your student may not be completely sure that college should be the next step or that his/her choice of colleges are a good fit. If you&#8217;re on the fence about whether your high school senior is truly ready for college, now is the perfect time to consider whether or not a gap year is a better option.<span id="more-1680"></span></p>
<p>You&#8217;ve probably heard the term before, but may still be asking yourself, <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=GapYearPrograms">what is a gap year</a>? I write a lot about gap years on the TeenLife Blog. But, the short answer is straightforward: a <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=GapYearPrograms">gap year</a> is a year taken by a recent high school graduate to volunteer, travel, work, or explore interests or passions before beginning college. The following benefits might make taking a gap year an attractive option for your teen and your family. Take a look!</p>
<ul>
<li><strong>Money</strong>: If your high school grad uses the gap year to work a local job and save up money, he&#8217;ll be in a much better place to offset the costs of tuition and books at his college, which don&#8217;t appear to be going down anytime soon. Even if he&#8217;s all set financially for college, having some spending money saved up will help him out during the year, and help teach him to be responsible about his finances.</li>
<li><strong>Experience</strong>: Using a <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=GapYearPrograms">year out </a>to learn more about a subject that really intrigues your grad, is a great way for her to really refine her passions and interests, putting her in a great place to pick classes once she starts college. Additionally, she can weed out the subject she&#8217;s not interested in, saving time and energy that she might have otherwise wasted on classes she wasn&#8217;t that into.</li>
<li><strong>Responsibility</strong>: Taking a year to travel on their own or volunteer abroad, can be exceedingly beneficial to a high school graduate who&#8217;s looking to get out into the real world and experience a sense of adulthood. By learning to live alone and make decisions independently, your grad will be well-poised to handle the stress and responsibilities that come with being a full time college student (talk about <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=College">college prep</a>)!</li>
</ul>
<p>Is your teen planning to take a gap year? Tell us about it!</p>
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		<title>Asperger’s, College Admissions, College Decisions &amp; the Quirky Factor</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/aspergers-college-admissions-college-decisions-the-quirky-factor/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=aspergers-college-admissions-college-decisions-the-quirky-factor</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/aspergers-college-admissions-college-decisions-the-quirky-factor/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 04 May 2012 16:00:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sarah Buttenwieser</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[College Admissions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[asperger's]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[college admissions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting teens]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1381</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Now that Asperger’s is a familiar entity, it’s hard to remember that not so long ago, it wasn’t. Fifteen years ago college consultant Allen Tinkler recalls a college disability coordinator asking a group of colleagues—via an email list focused upon colleges and disability services—about “Bergers Disease.” Like that Facebook relationship status, these days the answer [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Now that Asperger’s is a familiar entity, it’s hard to remember that not so long ago, it wasn’t. Fifteen years ago <a href="http://www.collegeboundservices.com/" target="_blank">college consultant Allen Tinkler</a> recalls a college disability coordinator asking a group of colleagues—via an email list focused upon colleges and disability services—about “Bergers Disease.”</p>
<p>Like that Facebook relationship status, these days the answer to what a <a title="College Application Resources" href="http://www.teenlife.com/?College_Application">college applicant</a> with Asperger’s should do is, according to Tinkler, “complicated.” That’s because every college is different and so is every student. “Being on the spectrum is by definition synonymous with infinite points in a range so it cannot be one thing and it cannot be easily defined,” Tinkler ventures. “Many kids diagnosed with Asperger’s test well, have good grades and are reasonably able to present themselves in an interview. Those kids merely come across as ‘quirky.’ Many kids, Asperger’s or no, are quirky. I’ve sat in my office with plenty of kids with Asperger’s and unless told about their Asperger’s I really wouldn’t know. They are equipped for college. They are academically prepared. If that’s the case, I think the student is better off not disclosing the diagnosis during the application phase. It’s a more cautious approach, taking that factor out of the admissions equation. Some schools don’t even want to know about a student’s disability during the admissions process.”</p>
<p>His reasoning is this: once accepted, if accommodations are necessary, the prospective student can work with the disability office to see what the college is able to offer and how capable it seems of doing so. He says, “Schools have come a long way and are by and large, much more in the spirit of the ADA standard. Even with the best intentions, some schools are better staffed, trained and equipped than others. After receiving acceptances the student should meet or speak with the disability offices of the schools seriously being considered to see which ones will provide the best services and accommodations meeting the student’s needs.”<span id="more-1381"></span></p>
<p>If the student’s needs are more severe, Tinkler says that’s another story. “A student’s inability to test well, for example,” he says, “requires explanation. The same is true for a student’s communication skills—if you need to explain why those skills are compromised, disclosure needs to happen up front. The diagnosis is a more important factor if the student will need a specialized program.” He adds, “This is why lumping all students with Asperger’s together with a one-size-fits-all approach makes no sense.”</p>
<p>Tinkler points out that there is much more standardization during K-12 in the United States because federal laws require certain actions. Post-secondary level accommodations are made more due to civil rights laws, and thus there is more variability. While the responsibility—by law—during the K-12 years is success, at the post secondary level, the college’s responsibility is access. The mindset changes and because of this, knowing what’s available and how it meshes with the individual is something the student—and that student’s family—needs to explore before making a decision about where to matriculate.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.collegeconfidential.com/sally_rubenstone.htm" target="_blank">College consultant Sally Rubenstone</a> took a novel approach with one student. To some schools the student disclosed his Asperger’s, but to others, he did not. The result: the student got into a range of schools, both schools he’d disclosed to and ones he hadn’t—and he was rejected from both schools he’d disclosed to and ones he hadn’t. The value, Rubenstone believes, in this approach really had everything to do with the student’s sense of self. She says, “Had he disclosed … or not disclosed … to the <em>entire </em>roster, he may have always wondered if he’d made the wrong choice. Despite being somewhat nutty, this bifurcated method revealed that whole process is so crazy addressing it this way is probably justifiable.”</p>
<p>Rubenstone says she begins the process of searching for a college with someone who has Asperger’s by addressing the same factors she uses for more “typical” applicants, such as <a title="Study Up with Test Prep Resources!" href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=CollegeTestPrep">SAT scores</a> and GPA. Beyond admissibility, she says, “We look at size, location, academic offerings, campus climate (weather, politics, and general vibe) to see if the school seems like a good fit … just as I would with <em>any</em> student.” From there, though, depending upon the student, she may add in other factors for consideration, including the schools’ “special needs” services to see how those “mesh with the student’s own needs.” Other logistical matters factor in as well. She offers examples: “How many students share a room … and a bathroom. Is the dining hall noisy?  How many students sit at a table? What sort of supervision is on each dorm floor?  Do students study in their room or in the library? How will the student get to and from college?” She explains, “While these are all issues that <em>every </em>parent might consider, for Asperger’s students and their families, the normal hurdles of daily living may feel higher in some areas than they do for typical teens and will require extra scrutiny.”</p>
<p>In other words, one size does not fit all.</p>
<p>This is why Tinkler’s wary of any lists boasting “good” services for Asperger’s. Blanket proclamations are inaccurate, he believes. He adds, “It’s unfair to inundate a school that way. You can’t lump schools together any more than you can lump kids together.” So, the advice of seasoned advisors goes like this: unless a student needs a specialized program, it’s better to do your searching, pretty much like everyone else.</p>
<div>
<div>
<div title="Sarah's Blog"><em><a title="Sarah's Blog" href="http://www.valleyadvocate.com/blogs/standingintheshadows" target="_blank">Sarah Werthan Buttenwieser</a> is a freelance writer. In addition to writing, she has four children: one each in high school, middle school, elementary school and preschool.</em></div>
</div>
<div title="Sarah's Blog"></div>
<div title="Sarah's Blog">Like this blog post? <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=blog_Enewsletter" target="_blank">Sign up for the TeenLife Newsletter</a>!</div>
</div>
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		<title>There is Still Time to Plan Your Teen’s Summer</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/there-is-still-time-to-plan-your-teens-summer/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=there-is-still-time-to-plan-your-teens-summer</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/05/there-is-still-time-to-plan-your-teens-summer/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 02 May 2012 16:00:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jill Tipograph</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Summer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting teens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Summer Vacation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teen community service]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teen work experience]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1686</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[May arrived early this year. Everyone was busy with work, school, and sports, and now the summer is almost upon us, and your teen has not yet made plans. Do not despair! It is not too late. While some programs may be filled, there are still many options open for your teenager. First, you must narrow [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://blog.teenlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/iStock_000017612070XSmall.jpg"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-1694" title="Summer camp counselor talking to children wearing life jackets" src="http://blog.teenlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/iStock_000017612070XSmall-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="199" /></a>May arrived early this year. Everyone was busy with work, school, and sports, and now the summer is almost upon us, and your teen has not yet made plans. Do not despair! It is not too late. While some programs may be filled, there are still <a title="Summer Programs" href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=SummerPrograms">many options open</a> for your teenager.</p>
<p>First, you must narrow down the choices. The options are more varied now than ever before. Your teenager needs a combination of work and play to keep mentally, emotionally and physically stimulated all summer long. Which of the following interests him/her: academics, community service, internships, language, leadership, specialties or travel?<span id="more-1686"></span></p>
<ul>
<li>If your teen would like to pursue<strong> academics</strong> over the summer months, he/she must choose the type. Enrichment classes offer either credit or non-credit value for high school and college. Gifted curricula are also available, as well as research opportunities. These programs typically take place on college or boarding school campuses, as do remedial courses, which can assist students in areas of need. Another option is college prep courses: SAT tutoring, diagnostic tests, as well as college application writing, essay and creative writing workshops, and college tours. These are offered as stand-alone options or in tandem with enrichment programs.</li>
<li>There is a growing interest in <strong><a title="TeenLife Community Service" href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=CommunityService">community service programs</a></strong> for the summer. These involve hands-on projects where students volunteer their time physically and mentally, to assist underprivileged, handicapped or indigent communities and/or people. Some of these programs may be integrated into an academic enrichment curriculum; most take place in rural areas both in the U.S., abroad and some third world nations. Options can involve foreign language and/or home stays as well.</li>
<li>If your teen is ready for independence and responsibility, <strong>internships</strong> are a great option to consider. These are in-field opportunities where qualified teens get hands-on experience in a variety of occupations and careers. Focuses can include: advertising, architecture, business, culinary arts, education, entertainment, fashion, film, finance, hospitality, journalism, sports management, theatre, veterinary medicine and more. Most internship programs require a minimum of age 16 and/or completion of the high school sophomore grade.</li>
<li><strong>Leadership programs</strong> include courses offered in academic enrichment programs, field-like opportunities in academic settings that give students exposure to leaders in different industries and hands-on experience in mock/role playing scenarios. Focuses include art, business, engineering, forensic science, international diplomacy, law, medicine and health care, politics and more. Another option involves outdoor leadership skills taught in advanced adventure trips that may require previous experience and a minimum age.</li>
<li><strong>Specialties</strong> are very popular, as students and athletes hone their particular skills, so that they can market themselves to colleges and coaches. Alternatively, others work on skills that need improving. Most take place on private/boarding school and university properties domestically and abroad, and are run by separate organizations or schools/universities themselves. Examples include: academics, arts, disciplinary, fitness/nutrition, special needs, and sports.</li>
<li><strong>Language programs</strong> have long been popular amongst teens. There are learning and/or immersion options. Locations are typically in countries of the spoken language; settings are rural, suburban, coastal or urban. Residential or home stay options, as well as a combination of both, are available. Some programs combine travel and/or community service with language study, exposing students to different dialects and culture variations.</li>
<li><strong>Teen tours and wilderness/adventure trips</strong> offer an organized way to visit places a teen may not otherwise experience. Consider your child’s primary reason for travel—socialization, touring, physical interests, cultural exposure; be sure to investigate the types of teens who are typically attracted to these various programs.</li>
</ul>
<p>Finally, your child may want to combine more than one of these options so that they can accomplish multiple objectives.</p>
<p dir="ltr"><em>Jill Tipograph is a nationally recognized youth and summer expert. She has guided many families worldwide through the summer planning process. Learn more about her on <a href="http://www.everythingsummer.com/">www.EverythingSummer.com</a>.</em></p>
<p dir="ltr">Like this blog post? <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=blog_Enewsletter" target="_blank">Sign up for the TeenLife Newsletter</a>!</p>
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		<title>Senior Year Class Selection</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/04/senior-year-class-selection/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=senior-year-class-selection</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/04/senior-year-class-selection/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 27 Apr 2012 16:00:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Rebecca Joseph</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[College Admissions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[High School]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[high school students]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting teens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teen applying to college]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1364</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Yes, this is for you &#8211; parents of high school juniors. As many juniors plan their senior year schedules, they often choose the path of least resistance. Yet, senior year should be a time for mastery, of exploration, and of rigor. Colleges want students who take their academics to the next level. So juniors need [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Yes, this is for you &#8211; parents of high school juniors.</p>
<p>As many juniors plan their senior year schedules, they often choose the path of least resistance. Yet, senior year should be a time for mastery, of exploration, and of rigor. <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=College">Colleges</a> want students who take their academics to the next level.</p>
<p>So juniors need to plan their senior years wisely. They need to keep going with content areas and not abandon anything. It is so hard doing college math if someone skips math senior year, and so on.<span id="more-1364"></span></p>
<p>Many seniors want free periods and early dismissals. Parents, teachers, and counselors, you need to be strong. You need to tell your junior that you know that they are tired and that junior year is so challenging. Remind them that they have one more year to show their academic talents and passions to colleges.</p>
<p>So please help your junior plan their senior year very wisely. Here are some tips to guide you and your junior through course selections for senior year.</p>
<ul>
<li>Do not take a light senior year. Colleges worry about students who take easy senior years with only a few core classes and fewer activities.</li>
<li>Do not abandon more than one subject area. That means if students are not taking a foreign language anymore, they must not give up history or science. If they dislike science, then take a foreign language and social science. Remember, they have to take math and language placement tests. If they don’t take those content areas senior year, those tests will be harder for them.</li>
<li>Take at least four core classes, not including electives. Five cores plus one elective are ideal. Colleges want to see academic interest, not abandonment.</li>
<li>Take as hard a year as they can. If they took some AP and honors classes in 11th grade, then take more senior year. If they didn’t take any, try one honors or AP class. Even though some public universities don’t see their senior year grades during the admissions process, they do count the number of AP and honors classes students take during senior year.</li>
<li>Follow interests. Senior year is often the only time in high school that students can take more than one elective. If students are interested in medicine or sports, take anatomy and physiology. If they are interested in teaching or helping people, take psychology. If they’re an artist, take another field of art. Encourage students to try new content areas.</li>
<li>Pick classes in which you can do well. Private colleges see fall grades. Wait-listed or deferred colleges may ask for spring grades. All colleges that accept students ask for spring grades. If grades drop, they often drop students.</li>
<li>Use summers to take more classes. Classes that students take during the summer can enhance your GPA. They can help students clear away Ds and Fs. College classes often count as AP level classes. Classes you take during the summer can enable students to take more electives senior year.</li>
<li>Plan to take one community college or college class during the summer or fall. If students have an academic interest, take a community college or college class during the summer and/or fall. They add to your GPA. They show how much students want to go to college. Colleges are looking for students with academic passions and interests. UCLA, for example, has a regular summer session.</li>
<li>Remember, colleges want students who like to go to class. If they see your student abandons classes and/or chooses a really light senior year, they will worry about your student’s approach to school once she goes to college. In college, students usually only take four classes at a time. Tell your child to look forward to that.</li>
<li>If students do take an easier schedule, then they must fill their time with a job, volunteer work, or internship. They must dedicate the amount of time they would have been in that class to an activity. Colleges also want students who use their time productively.</li>
</ul>
<p><em><a title="Get Me to College!" href="http://getmetocollege.org/">Dr. Rebecca Joseph</a> is a college access and admissions expert. A tenured professor at a local university, she believes that all students should have the option of a college education and does everything she can to help students, communities, and schools empower their students to make it to and through college.</em></p>
<p>Like this blog post? <a title="TeenLife Newsletter" href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=blog_Enewsletter">Sign up for the TeenLife Newsletter</a>!</p>
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		<title>Maintaining A College Acceptance</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/04/maintaining-a-college-acceptance/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=maintaining-a-college-acceptance</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/04/maintaining-a-college-acceptance/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 Apr 2012 16:00:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrea Glovsky</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[College Admissions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[High School]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[college admissions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[getting through high school]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[high school senior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[high school senior burnout]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting teens]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1653</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[For seniors and parents this time of the year presents a challenge.  Everyone is ready to move on, but unfortunately there are courses to finish and rules to follow.  Colleges have made their decisions and most students are already mentally in fast-forward to August. College acceptances, unfortunately, are contingent on successful completion of all senior [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>For seniors and parents this time of the year presents a challenge.  Everyone is ready to move on, but unfortunately there are courses to finish and rules to follow.  Colleges have made their decisions and most students are already mentally in fast-forward to August. <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=College">College</a> acceptances, unfortunately, are contingent on successful completion of all senior year courses.  AP classes need to be finished.  Independent projects are expected to be completed.  All grades <strong>must</strong> be maintained. Every high school is required to send a final transcript to the selected college. There are many stories to relate every year about students who have had their acceptances rescinded.  An A student of mine got 2 C-’s and the college required him to attend summer school.  Another school rescinded the acceptance of a student with 1 D and an incomplete.  The two most common reasons for negating acceptances are a drop in grades or reported behavior that is considered unacceptable. (Cheating, getting caught with drugs or alcohol, an arrest, bullying, and “sexting” are all such unacceptable social behaviors.) All high schools must report any known such behavior to the college, especially suspensions.</p>
<p>What can a parent do? The parents’ role in all of this is to remember you are there to establish the rules and limits.  Rules help students learn behavior that carries over to college.  You and your rules are also an excuse for your child to choose not to do things “that everyone else is doing”.  A bad grade needs to bring about grounding even if it makes you unpopular.<span id="more-1653"></span></p>
<p>Take out the college letter.  Highlight the statement of contingency and hang it someplace as a reminder.  Put in place some limits without taking away all of the fun and privilege of being a senior. Remind the senior that doing well on an AP exam might mean they do not have to repeat course in college.</p>
<p>The social limits are even harder.  There are always parties, warm nights, and free time.  Talk to your adolescents. Sit at the kitchen table, no phones, no music, no distractions.  Help them to understand what they do will follow them.  If they are in the pack who get arrested, even if they were not doing anything “bad”, they are guilty by association.  This behavior now often even makes its way onto social media.  A student of mine got caught at a party of returning college friends the night before graduation.  They were smoking pot.  The senior was caught with them and not allowed to go to his own high school graduation. He was also told by his accepting college to find another university; they no longer wanted him. A tough problem to solve on June 5<sup>th</sup>!</p>
<p><em>Counseling in the college and independent school placement field since 1988, Andrea Glovsky has successfully helped hundreds of students by matching interests and abilities to the most appropriate school.  For more information, visit her website: <a href="http://www.findingcolleges.com/" target="_blank">www.findingcolleges.com</a></em></p>
<p>Like this blog post? <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=blog_Enewsletter">Sign up for the TeenLife Newsletter</a>!</p>
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		<title>Volunteering: A Great Last-Minute Addition to Teens&#8217; Summer Plans</title>
		<link>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/04/volunteering-a-great-last-minute-addition-to-teens-summer-plans/?utm_source=rss&#038;utm_medium=rss&#038;utm_campaign=volunteering-a-great-last-minute-addition-to-teens-summer-plans</link>
		<comments>http://blog.teenlife.com/2012/04/volunteering-a-great-last-minute-addition-to-teens-summer-plans/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 23 Apr 2012 16:00:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Marie Schwartz</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[High School]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Summer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Volunteer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Community Service]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[high school community service]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TeenLife]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[voluntouring]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[youth community service]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blog.teenlife.com/?p=1660</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If you think your teenager still has too much free time this summer or even if you don’t, consider community service. Not only does it come with various benefits, teens have a lot of flexibility when scheduling time to give back. I’ve written before about the benefits of community service. I usually focus on the [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>If you think your teenager still has too much free time this summer or even if you don’t, consider community service. Not only does it come with various benefits, teens have a lot of flexibility when scheduling time to give back.</p>
<p>I’ve written before about the benefits of community service. I usually focus on the following points which we talk about often at <a href="www.teenlife.com">TeenLife</a>:</p>
<ul>
<li>The opportunity to make a real impact.</li>
<li>Insight into social issues.</li>
<li>Enhanced self-esteem.</li>
<li>A broader social circle.</li>
<li>Acquisition of skills that can be applied in class, on the job, and in new social situations.</li>
<li><a href="http://blog.teenlife.com/2011/12/how-community-service-can-make-a-standout-college-application/">A standout college application</a>.</li>
</ul>
<p>I wanted to let you in on some secrets of scheduling volunteer experiences so that you might capitalize on some last-minute opportunities to enrich your teen’s summer. Here are just a few tips!</p>
<p><strong>Students can volunteer around sports commitments and travel schedules.</strong> Many parents I speak to don’t realize the breadth of volunteer opportunities available to teens. Many of them do not require long time commitments. If students have a day here and there, they may be able to volunteer at community events. If they have a week free, many organizations would be delighted to have their help even on a short-term basis.<span id="more-1660"></span></p>
<p><strong>Students can volunteer on vacation.</strong> Have you heard of voluntouring or traveling while on vacation? You can read all about it in <a href="http://blog.teenlife.com/2011/12/voluntouring-a-great-travel-experience-for-families/">this post</a>. If you have plans to get away with your family this summer, you may want to do some quick research to see if there are any local non-profits that might be interesting to work with for a day or two. It’s a great way to experience local culture and give back at the same time.</p>
<p><strong>Students can volunteer remotely. </strong>We all know that comfort with technology and social media is a great strength of today’s young people. Are there organizations in your area that may need some help with research projects or online marketing? If your student is traveling or has too packed of a schedule to travel to an non-profit’s office, volunteering remotely could be a great option.</p>
<p>Want more ideas? Take a look at TeenLife’s listings for <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/?page=CommunityService">community service organizations</a> and <a href="http://www.teenlife.com/events/event_list.asp">community events</a>.</p>
<p>Is your teen volunteering this summer? Tell me about it!</p>
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